


I Hate You, I Love You

by ParkJiminisPrettiestBoy



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: M/M, briefly mentioned Steve Rogers/Tony Stark, everyone except sam bucky and steve are mentioned like once, pls don't make fun of me this is the first time i've written a scene that implies they fuck, this is literally me taking their mcu relationship and going in more depth
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-13
Updated: 2020-03-13
Packaged: 2021-02-28 21:46:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,603
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23124205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ParkJiminisPrettiestBoy/pseuds/ParkJiminisPrettiestBoy
Summary: ok so...this isn't my proudest work, i will admit anyways i hope you like <3
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Sam Wilson
Comments: 2
Kudos: 23





	1. Enemies and Enemies Only

**Author's Note:**

  * For [livebreathelove1042](https://archiveofourown.org/users/livebreathelove1042/gifts).



> ok so...this isn't my proudest work, i will admit anyways i hope you like <3

“H.Y.D.R.A. doesn’t like leaks,” Sitwell says suddenly from the back seat, as if trying to negotiate for something.

“Then why don’t you stick a cork in it?” Sam snaps. _God, this guy._

Nat leans forward, sticking her head around the passenger seat, “Insight’s launching in sixteen hours, we’re cutting it kinda close.” 

Sam can’t help but agree with her. They were really cutting it close, and the fact that anyone -- _anyone_ \-- Sam loved, his siblings, his nephews and nieces, could be one of the couple billion people randomly killed really didn’t help with the stress.

“I know, we’ll use him to bypass the DNA scans and access the Helicarriers directly,” Steve answered, without missing a beat. Damn, he was really good at this captain stuff.  
Sitwell, of course, has to get his two-bit in, “What?! Are you crazy? That is a terrible, terrible idea--”

There’s a sudden loud thump on the roof of Sam’s car, and before anyone can react, an arm smashes through the window Sitwell was sitting beside and flings him out like a doll. Sam hears Sitwell screaming as he flies through the air, and then fade away. 

“What the hell?!” Sam yells, as the person on his roof starts shooting into the car.

Moving swiftly from the backseat, Nat crawls into Steve’s lap, who in turn yanks the brake handle beside him, slamming the car to a stop and sending the person on Sam’s roof flying onto the road. Cars are still passing as if nothing’s happening, but all Sam can see is the man in front of them, who’s slowly standing up as if he wasn’t just thrown 30 feet onto concrete. He’s covered head-to-toe in leather black (how can he survive the heat?), a mask and goggles covering his face so the only thing visible is his forehead. The man is definitely ripped, his torso shaped like a dorito, with thick thighs that look like they could crush a watermelon (which is hard, Sam would know from personal experience). He has an assortment of small weapons resting on his hips. His left arm looks to be made of metal or covered in metal, and the way he’s standing now and glaring at the three in the car is giving Sam chills.  
Out of the corner of his eye, Sam sees Nat pull out her gun and aim at the mysterious man. Before anything else can happen though, a big truck that Sam did not see coming smashes into the back of his car, pushing them towards the man at an alarming speed, and Nat drops her gun in the process. The leather-clad man flips over the car just before he’s hit, and lands right back on Sam’s roof.

 _Goddamnit_ \-- suddenly, an arm breaks through the windshield and rips the steering wheel out of Sam’s hands. “SHIT,” he shouts, as there’s no way of controlling his car.

This is not going to end well.

Later, when he’s cuffed in the truck, and after finding out the mysterious man was actually Steve’s childhood friend, Sam notes that that indeed did not end well. Sam mulls over what the hell just happened, and wow was that a first impression on Barnes’ part.

\- - - -

Back at the H.Y.D.R.A. base, the Winter Soldier is tense. He’s “unstable,” is what the doctors say.

He can’t think straight. The man on the bridge…called him “Bucky”. _Who the hell is Bucky?_ He recognized the man, but can’t remember from _what_. The rush of flashbacks hits him hard, the frustration of not knowing who the other man was, that the man said a name, all mixed together, and the Soldier lashed out at the agent fixing his arm, sending him flying into the wall -- and most likely to his death.

The Soldier doesn’t even register that someone else is pointing a gun at him, and he starts thinking of the other two people with the man on the bridge. He most definitely knew the woman -- hell, he trained her. Natalia Romanova. How she escaped the Red Room, God knows.

The other man though…he was different. Had determination, he seemed--

The Soldier is cut off by a slap across the face. He fucked up. That’s not good.

A few minutes later, after his handler seemed pissed to no end at him, the Winter Soldier’s leaning back against the hard chair, grinding his teeth into the leather as mind-searing pain erupts in his head, and--

He doesn’t remember anything. 

\- - - -

So, Nick Fury is back from the dead. 

And Sam’s now taking part in taking down one of the biggest organizations in the world.

Oh! And the Winter Soldier is here. 

That last part just got to Sam about a minute ago when he shoved Steve off the edge into nothing. It takes Sam a second to realize what the hell just happened; one minute Steve was there, the next _gone_.

“STEVE!” Sam screams desperately, and he’s about to go flying after him, but something grabs one of his wings. He’s thrown back, and Sam sees the Winter Soldier. Rage courses through his body, and he almost sees red. That bastard just shoved Steve off the edge. He’s gonna pay for that. 

“Son of a bitch!” Sam yells as he starts shooting and flying back to the Soldier. The other man seems unfazed by this, and before Sam can get too far from the Helicarrier, something’s snagged him. _What--_

In a split second, he’s being slammed into the ground on his back. The breath has been knocked out of him, and he’s just pissed now. The suit’s most likely ruined, he’s of no use to Cap now. As he struggles to stand up, there’s a boot and he’s kicked off the Helicarrier. Thank God, he still has the parachute, but now he’s not useful anymore.

As Sam floats away, he flips off the Soldier, which he knows is unprofessional, but it’s not like he’s gonna get in trouble or anything, and the Soldier just glares at him. 

Yeah, Sam’s really not liking this guy. 

\- - - -

The Soldier watches the other man (who he almost recognizes) float away on a parachute. At least his suit can’t work anymore. One down, two to go. 

The man then flips the Soldier off, which he considers one of the highest forms of disrespect, and he can’t do anything except glare and hope for a next time. 

He has other, more important priorities anyways.


	2. Still Enemies, Maybe We're Getting Somewhere Actually?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> translations at the end!! also this is the longest chapter

As Sam waits for Steve in a coffee shop in Austria, he thinks over and over about Bucky Barnes’ past life because…damn, did he go through some shit.

First he led a normal life -- which, with Steve, meant pulling his ass out of fights he had no hope in -- he had rich parents, and was the oldest of four, the only boy. Then the war happened, and so did Steve’s becoming Captain America. 

Steve rescued his best friend from H.Y.D.R.A., only to lose him on another mission shortly after the rescue. Everyone thought Bucky was dead from falling off the train -- he had actually been recaptured by H.Y.D.R.A. and been brainwashed, tortured into the Winter Soldier. And then credited with over two dozen assassinations within the next 70 years or so. 

And then, Bucky reunites with Steve in a fight not too long ago (ok, two years, but when he had been spending that much time _looking_ for the guy it feels much shorter), and Steve seems to break through 70+ years of brainwashing by simply asking, “Bucky?”

Of course, then the Soldier goes rogue and no one ever sees him again -- no matter how hard they looked, followed trails that led to dead ends -- until recently. When Bucky bombed the UN.

And, on a side note, if Sam’s going to be completely honest…that man definitely never lost his looks. Even through all he had been through. Sam had seen pictures of pre-H.Y.D.R.A. Bucky, and Sam was no blind or dumb man. The guy looked fine as _hell_ , especially in his uniform from his army times. Sam knew not to mention any of that to Steve -- Bucky was a touchy subject, always had been, so Sam kept it all to himself and suppressed those thoughts down into the pits of his deep dark soul where he kept all his deep dark thoughts. Of course, said deep dark thoughts had somehow crawled out and were now running around in the back of his mind. Another reason he kept them to himself was because, for god’s sake, how unprofessional would it be for Sam to _admit_ anything like that about the guy he was tracking down, the guy who killed so many people, the guy who was most likely Steve’s first love (Sam isn’t stupid, he’s heard the way Steve talks about Bucky. The same way Sam used to talk about Riley).

Cut to a couple hours later, and Sam is now positioned on the roof of Bucky’s apartment building -- he’s honestly kinda pissed it only took everyone else a couple of hours to find this guy when he and Steve had been spending two years with nothing but rumors and deadlocks. 

Sam hears Steve quietly walk through Bucky’s apartment, then pick something up. Pages are flipped, and Sam almost chastises Steve for going through Bucky’s stuff, but keeps quiet. This is probably a lot for Steve, Sam scolds himself. Keep an eye out for anyone else, stick with the plan, wait--

Well, speak of the devil (or devils?) Sam spots the German special forces -- _what the hell are they doing here?_ Sam lets Steve know, and tracks where the officers are going.

And then Sam hears him. The man, the myth, the legend. James Buchanan Barnes himself.

\- - - -

Bucky had _just_ started to get his life back in order (or what he thought was back in order…) and then some jackass decides to pose as the Winter Soldier, bomb the UN, kill the King of Wakanda…

Now here he is with Steve Rogers standing in his apartment. Steve didn’t see him at first, and the rage Bucky felt when he saw the other man going through his notebooks is unnecessary, he concludes upon hearing a man over a radio inform Steve of German special forces coming in… _shit_.

Steve finally turns around, and after a few seconds of silence asks, “Do you know me?”

Of course Bucky knows him. Who doesn’t? There’s a whole museum dedicated to Steve Rogers, Captain America, but the part that was most unsettling was that he, Bucky Barnes, was Steve’s childhood friend. Now, Bucky had gotten back a few faint memories over the months since he had escaped H.Y.D.R.A., he knows about that part except…the memories were broken, he only remembered bits and pieces. 

“You’re Steve. I read about you in a museum,” Bucky finally says. 

_“They’ve set the perimeter,”_ comes the small voice from Steve’s radio, and Bucky now recognizes the voice from the man on the highway that was with Steve. That means they have about 30 seconds left. 

Steve doesn’t answer the other man, still staring at Bucky, “I know you’re nervous. And you have plenty of reason to be. But you’re lying.” _About what?_ Bucky scoffs internally. He hates when people act like this, tries to approach him like you would with a wild animal -- slow, cautious.

Must be about Vienna, “I wasn't in Vienna. I don’t do that anymore,” Bucky states, sounding almost annoyed. That part was true, he had been trying so hard to lay low, to forget about his past life in those cold winter nights. 

_“They’re entering the building.”_

15 seconds. 

“Well, the people who think you did are coming here now. And they’re not planning on taking you alive,” Steve says.

Bucky smiles tightly, “That’s smart. Good strategy.” And it is. He would do the same. 

_“They’re on the roof, I’m compromised.”_

Bucky hears the dull thud of boots hitting the old wood on the stairs.

10 seconds.

“This doesn’t have to end in a fight, Buck,” Steve tries, and Bucky almost laughs.

“It always ends in a fight,” he says dryly, taking off his glove.

The boots stop which means-- 

_“5 seconds,”_ says the man at the same time Bucky thinks it. Almost like they’re in sync. The man’s probably trained in this, Bucky should think nothing of this -- they’re not soulmates or anything.

“You pulled me from the river. Why?” Steve’s voice raises a slight notch, and Bucky’s set on edge now. He doesn’t do well with loud voices. He can’t think, can’t remember, his thoughts are all muddled from the anxiety of the situation and Steve raising his voice, so all he says very quickly is, “I don’t know.”

“Yes, you do,” Steve says, almost like he was talking to a _child_ , taking a step towards Bucky, while the other man yells there’s 3 seconds left. The Germans break down the door and before he knows it, his instincts have kicked in and Bucky’s taking out every goddamn officer he sees.

_Always ends in a fight._

Later, after the 3 of them are arrested, Bucky’s placed in (probably) solitary confinement. He’s so pissed, he doesn’t even acknowledge the therapist in front of him…who Bucky’s not even sure _is_ a therapist, there’s just something about him that sets Bucky off.

And then the power goes out, and Bucky knows something bad is gonna happen--

“Why don’t we talk about your home. Not Romania, certainly not Brooklyn, no. I mean,” the man takes out a red book Bucky had hoped would’ve been destroyed after all these years, “your _real_ home.” And then Bucky freezes, panic taking a grip of his throat like it had never before. 

_No, it can’t be--_

And then it starts, “Желание.” 

_No._

After so long of being free from H.Y.D.R.A.’s control.

“Ржавый,” the man continues. 

“Stop,” Bucky’s shaking now, on the verge of tears, _please, God no--_

“Семнадцать.” The flashbacks start. _He’s being dragged through snow, blood trailing behind him, staining the pure white snow._

“Stop,” Bucky all but begs, not wanting to live through the flashbacks again, he’s sure he’s crying at this point.

But the man barrels forward.

“Рассвет.” _Arnim Zola is standing over him, smiling down at him._

A scream works its way up his throat, and Bucky rips the restraints off his arms.

“Печь.” _The Soldier is given his first mission, his first kill._

“Девять.” The Soldier starts punching the door on his prison, needing to get out. _The Soldier is put into cryo, then taken out again after an unknown amount of time._

“Добросердечный.” The Soldier starts punching the door harder, feeling the metal hinges weaken. _The Soldier is training others, the way he was trained._

“Возвращение на родину.” _The Soldier is sent to kill threats Howard and Maria Stark._

“Один.” _Cryo freeze again. He’s told the reason is to lengthen his lifetime._

“Грузовой вагон,” his handler softly finishes. 

The Soldier is standing outside his cage now. His handler comes up beside him, ignoring the fallen door.

A long silence.

The Soldier doesn’t dare break it, for fear of death.

“Солдат?” his handler asks.

The Soldier answers, exactly like he was trained. No eye contact, don’t raise your voice, answer instantly.

“Я готов отвечать.”

\- - - -

Sam and Steve race towards Bucky’s cell, and Sam is in a state somewhere between panic and anger. All that searching, _finally_ finding Barnes, and they lose him within the hour.

They enter the room that previously held Barnes and a fist swings and misses him by a millimeter. _Found him._ And based on the absence of emotion except rage on his face, Bucky must’ve been given the trigger words. Sam attempts to fight back, but the other man simply grabs him by the jaw (and God if this was an entirely different situation…) and throws Sam away from him as if he was a ragdoll.

When he comes to, which was only after a few seconds, he runs outside, looking for where Steve and Bucky went.

The next 20 minutes are absolute _chaos._ Steve did everything in his power (quite literally) to not let Bucky go again. And if that wasn’t the most romantic shit Sam had heard in his goddamn life, he didn’t know.

Moving on, Sam caught up with them at the river and helped Steve drag a very wet and unconscious (and _heavy_ ) Bucky Barnes to a warehouse. They stuck his metal arm in a vice to keep him restrained if needed, and took turns watching him. It was Sam’s turn when Bucky woke up. But before that, Sam realized this gave him an excellent time to study the face of the man they had been chasing down for months. 

Bucky, on God, had the face of a damn _angel_ when he was asleep (or unconscious, in this case) with his high cheekbones, stubble brushed across his cheeks. His lips were thin (as was the case with white men, Sam knew from personal experience), but not too thin -- they were full. His hair definitely needed at least a trim, but from where Sam was standing, it looked soft and he almost ( _almost_ ) wanted to run his hands through it. _Almost._

“Quit your goddamn staring,” comes Bucky’s hoarse voice and Sam startles. Bucky hadn’t even moved. He must’ve sensed it, what with heightened and fine-tuned senses. 

“I wasn’t staring,” Sam snaps, while blushing like a schoolgirl talking to her crush because _fucking hell, his voice was melodic as shit._

Bucky, on the other hand, lets out a dry chuckle. “Nice try.”

Sam simply huffs, seeing this is a lost cause, then shouts for Steve. He takes note of Bucky’s flinch, the therapist in him coming out.

Steve jogs over, and Bucky seems to stiffen and relax at the same time.

“Steve,” he says softly.

Steve frowns faintly, “Which Bucky am I talking to?”

Bucky’s face takes on a smile, which seemed…almost unnatural. Sam had never seen the man smile except in pictures, “Your mom’s name was Sarah. You used to put newspaper in your shoes.” 

Sam watches, incredulously, as Steve smiles and says, “Can’t read that in a museum.” Sam holds back a sigh of exasperation. This man really just instantly trusted James Barnes after being told two things you “can’t read in a museum”.

“And just like that, we’re supposed to be cool?” Sam asks, almost instantly regretting saying it (but not entirely, someone needs to keep Steve’s ass in check), when Bucky’s smile melts from his face as the reality of the situation hits him.

“What did I do?” Bucky asks, clenching his jaw.

“Enough,” is Steve’s answer.

“Oh God, I knew this would happen. All he had to say was the goddamn words,” Bucky says, almost like he’s mad at himself instead of at the doctor, which he has every right to be.   
Bucky then goes into detail about four other soldiers, much like him, that the doctor was after, and Sam is astonished at how much H.Y.D.R.A. had accomplished.

\- - - -  
Bucky feels like he’s in an interrogation, with Steve and the other man (Sam, Bucky’s pretty sure his name is) asking questions and staring him down. Bucky can’t shake the fact that Sam had been staring at him, and then snapped and refused to admit it. Bucky’s no fool, he’s almost 100% convinced Sam’s most likely developing a crush, but now is _not_ the time, and Sam hadn’t really made a great first impression. The man is so much younger than Bucky -- honestly, kids these days fall for people too hard and too fast -- and he’s just annoying in general. God, Bucky kind of hated him.

20 minutes later after much discussion as to what to do next, Steve’s stolen a car (really, Steve? A Volkswagen Beetle???). Bucky’s been shoved to the back seat after Sam practically ran to the passenger seat, listening but not really listening to Steve and Sam’s conversation. Did Sam _ever_ stop trying to act like he was top tier shit? Did he ever shut up? And for God’s sake, could the man move his seat up?

Wait. Did Bucky hear that right?

_The car ride is 17 hours long???_

This is going to be hell.

Not even an hour in, Sam and Bucky are fighting calmly (“Yes, Steve, we’re fighting calmly. We haven't even raised our voices yet-- yes, Steve, fighting calmly includes cussing each other out in different languages”) over the radio. Sam turned it on after a while, and it stayed on that one for about 20 minutes. Except it was in Romanian. So nobody understood a word, except Bucky. Sam started changing it, trying to find an English radio station.

“You’re not gonna find an English radio station here, Wilson,” Bucky finally says, and Sam huffs in irritation.

“Well, I don’t understand a goddamn thing that’s going on.”

“Want me to translate for you?” Bucky asks sarcastically, “besides, these are good songs, so--” Sam changes it again. The offender looks up in the rearview mirror to see Bucky glaring at him.

“What?” Sam snaps.

“Fecior de curva,” Bucky mutters under his breath, slouching in his seat. 

Now Sam glares at him through the mirror, “I know you’re cussing at me in Romanian.”

“Oh, bine pentru tine,” Bucky mockingly praises Sam, rolling his eyes.

They banter back and forth, Sam in Spanish, Bucky in whatever language comes to mind, for the next 10 minutes. Steve finally scolds them quietly, like the mother he is and they shut up, save for Bucky muttering all curses imaginable in every language he knows and Sam just glaring at him.

Several hours later, Bucky starts kicking Sam’s seat just for the sake of annoying him and _move your seat up, goddamnit._

“Ok, that’s enough,” Sam finally turns around, and Bucky can barely contain his smile.

“What? Am I annoying you?” Bucky asks innocently.

“Bucky,” comes Steve’s warning. Sam turns back around in his seat, arms crossed, and Steve looks up in the mirror, raising an eyebrow at Bucky.

“He’s not moving his seat up!” Bucky protests. If anyone should get in trouble, it should be Wilson. 

“Well maybe if you had asked I would’ve before, but now I’m just not gonna,” Sam retorts.

“Чертов маленький ребенок,” Bucky bites back in Russian, relishing in the confusion and anger in Sam’s face.

“Stop cursing at me in different languages!”

“Нет.”

They finally, _finally_ , come to a stop somewhere in Germany, and Sharon Carter is out front. Bucky vaguely remembers her from when they fought while he was under -- and she was decent compared to him -- but then he can’t take it anymore. Bucky shifts a bit so he can see Sam’s face.

“Can you move your seat up?” Bucky asks calmly, trying a different tactic than the one he had used hours before.

Sam doesn’t even flinch, staring out the window, and Bucky almost asks the question again in case he didn’t hear, but then he finally does answer.

“No.”

Ok, maybe Bucky did deserve that for all the shit he gave Sam during the car ride. Bucky decides to move over (something he should’ve done hours ago), his weight shaking the rickety car, and Sam only glances back, not giving a damn.

\- - - -

Of course he’s not moving his seat up for Bucky. Not after all the shit he gave Sam during the car ride -- kicking his seat, arguing about the _fucking radio_. And not just that, there’s also the fact the man wrecked his car (that he saved up for for so _long_ ), yanked him down onto concrete on his back, choked him, decided to _fucking disappear_ , the list goes on and on. In short: he should really hate this man. And he actually kind of does. Bucky had been the cause of Sam’s anger and irritation. Sam knows this would never make sense to any rational human being, but it keeps Sam from going insane.

Steve just had to pair them up for their own little side mission while he dealt with Tony. They had to find the Quinjet. It was not an easy task, when both men were stubborn jackasses.

“We found it,” Sam says, after much arguing. “Their Quinjet’s in hanger 5, north runway.”

“Still thought it was in 4, it made more sense,” Bucky mutters, watching the two groups of Avengers in the airport.

“Yeah, well you were wrong,” Sam snaps for the hundredth time it seems today. 

Sam _still_ doesn’t know a lick of Russian, but Bucky starts muttering what might be a few choice words to Sam.

They start running for the Quinjet after given the signal, when Bucky notices something, “What the hell is that?”

“Everybody’s got a gimmick now,” Sam says through gritted teeth.

The “something” turns out to be a bratty 15-year-old kid who can’t seem to keep his mouth shut to save his life.

“I don’t know if you’ve ever been in a fight before, but there’s usually not this much talking,” Sam says like he’s talking to a little kid, but in an angry way (and is he wrong though? This kid is like 6), now stuck to the railing behind him.

“Alright sorry, my bad,” the Spider-Kid swings down to kick Sam to the next floor, and Sam braces himself for the pain to come because that kid is unusually strong, but Bucky jumps in front of him. Why? Sam doesn’t know, but there isn’t any time to ask as there is currently a _six-year-old_ beating both their asses. He’s also treating this whole thing like a game, like it’s a joke almost.

Sam hits the hard floor, which wouldn’t be so bad if he could’ve twisted to not land on his back and there wasn’t a 260-lb man on his chest, and it feels like the breath is knocked out of him (again? Seriously?). Before either of them know it, they’re webbed to the ground. Sam’s arms are tied to his chest, and Bucky’s left arm is held above him. The kid’s talking about how he has to “impress Mr. Stark,” and Sam subtly directs Redwing to get rid of the brat, who doesn’t even see it coming. His scream fades into the distance as Redwing grabs the kid’s webbing, dragging him outside and then dropping him, a sound most pleasing to Sam’s ears.\

“You couldn’t have done that earlier?” comes Bucky’s annoyed voice.

Sam grits his teeth, “I hate you.”

“Well, the feeling’s mutual.”

“Shut up, Barnes. Can’t your arm break through this sticky shit?”

“I don’t _know_ Sam, I’ve never really been in a situation like this,” Bucky gestures as much as he can with his free arm to the mess around him that consists of the sticky stuff that most likely came out of the kid and bits of glass and metal. To be honest, Sam hadn’t either. 

“Could you at least _try_?” Sam snaps, coming back to reality. 

“Well what about you, Wilson, surely you’ve got a knife on you somewhere.”

“If you couldn’t tell, my arms are currently restrained and I can’t do much except listen to your dumb ass,” Sam retorts.

There’s a silence, and Sam’s considering calling Steve, but then Bucky’s softly groaning, and Sam suddenly can’t focus on anything else, because god _damn_ was that noise beautiful to his ears and he wants to hear it more except in a different environment and he should really stop thinking about that because he’s supposed to hate that bitch but here he is getting turned on basically and--

“Fucking hell, this stuff is strong,” Bucky’s soft voice breaks through Sam’s daydreaming, and he comes back to reality. 

Sam tries to forget about what just went through his mind, so he stands up, trying to break through the webs, but probably looks stupid with his regular-human strength compared to all this. Bucky comes up to him, some still dangling from his metal hand, and then he’s ripping the webbing off Sam’s arms. There’s another silence, except it’s awkward this time because for once they’re touching (skin-to-skin) but not because they’re in a fight and Sam really has to stop thinking like this, it’s like one of his high school crushes all over again.

“You really think this stuff came out of the kid?” Bucky asks looking up, slightly smirking, a twinkle in his eyes Sam had never seen before. 

If he’s going to be completely honest, it kind of takes his breath away, and he wants Bucky to never stop doing that.

“Well, where else is it supposed to come out of? A little container of that shit on his wrist or something?” Bucky lets out a little chuckle, then stops himself and Sam almost says “no, don’t stop that beautiful laugh,” but he doesn’t because they kind of hate each other except…maybe not. Maybe. Sam isn’t sure. Bucky finishes with the webbing, and gives a Sam a onceover -- and it almost looks like Bucky was checking Sam out? No, he was just checking for more of the webbing. 

Right? 

\- - - -

Yes, Bucky took the chance of looking for more webbing on Sam just to check him out. Not that he’d ever admit it to anyone except himself. It’s just…maybe Sam isn’t as bad as Bucky took him to be. Maybe he was too brash in the beginning. He’s had these thoughts, too; about trying to navigate through the 21st century with Sam by his side (listen, 17 hours gives you a lot of time to think over shit), maybe they settle down, adopt two kids.

No, Bucky tells himself firmly, now isn’t the time. Besides, with all the shit still in your mind, who would trust you with a family, with children?

And then it hits him. Go back to cryo. Wakanda has to have that type of technology, it would be safer for everyone, including himself.

Bucky’s mind is set, except there’s a nagging somewhere in the back that this might not be a good idea, that he’d be leaving someone important behind -- and not Steve. Someone else.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Translations  
> (Bucky being a little shit)  
> *Romanian*  
> Fecior de curva - Son of a bitch  
> Oh, bine pentru tine - Oh, good for you  
> *Russian*  
> Чертов маленький ребенок - Fucking little kid  
> Нет - No
> 
> (Bucky’s trigger words)  
> Желание - Longing  
> Ржавый - Rusted  
> Семнадцать - 17  
> Рассвет - Daybreak  
> Печь - Furnace  
> Девять - Nine  
> Добросердечный - Benign  
> Возвращение на родину - Homecoming  
> Один - One  
> Товарный вагон - Freight Car


	3. Friends Definitely. Maybe More?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> pls don't make fun of me (pt. 2): i don't know how relationships work bc i've never been in one so pls keep that in mind when reading the next 2 chapters

_“You’re not going to hurt anyone, Bucky,” Steve had tried for the tenth time. Sam stood at the back of the guest bedroom given to Bucky in Wakanda, watching the two stubborn men argue._

_“Steve, all anyone needs is the fucking words and I’m done. Who knows what I’d do without control over my own actions,” Bucky calmly explains, but with an undertone of anger._

_“Buck, we can work on that, you can go to therapy or something -- get help, get it out of your system,” Steve’s all but on his knees at this point, begging Bucky to not do this._

_“Steve. Please, it’s better for everyone if I’m gone,” his voice trembled, but the force of Bucky’s words hit them all, and there’s tears slipping down Steve’s cheeks. It honestly breaks Sam to see Steve reach his limit, but Bucky looked even worse. He stood up, walking to Steve, already stumbling over apologies, but Steve’s out of the room before Bucky can even reach him. Sam almost ran after Steve, but stopped himself when he saw Bucky collapse back onto the bed, face in his hands._

_There’s a loud silence in the room, and then Sam quietly sat down beside Bucky, his hand hovering over Bucky’s shoulder, wanting to comfort him but at the same time not sure if their friendship had even reached that level. Sam pushes through, and starts slowly rubbing his hand over Bucky’s back._

_“I might not agree with your choice, but I understand it. And…personally, it wouldn’t be better for everyone if you were gone, I’d-- we’d all miss you. A lot,” Sam had no idea what else he was going to say, and was about to open his mouth again, but felt Bucky’s shoulders shaking underneath his hand._

_He’s crying, the realization hit Sam._

_“Either way, I’m always here for you. Alright?” Bucky doesn’t answer, so Sam doesn’t say anything, just comforting through contact._

_“Would you really miss me, Wilson?” Bucky finally asked, voice rough and quiet. He’s stopped crying, at least for now._

_“Yeah, Barnes. I would.” He sighed, “I…I didn’t mean to say that part out loud, but I would. We’ve only known, really known, each other for a short while but I’ve enjoyed it. I…” Sam hesitated, then kept going, “I do want to get to know you better, but if you’re gonna go into cryo, then, well, I’ll wait for you.”_

Dammit Dammit Dammit Dammit, way to go, Wilson, you overshared. 

_This would be the part in the movie (probably Disney or some shit) where they confess their love for each other and then kiss dramatically with music playing in the background, but this isn’t a movie, so to Sam’s disappointment, all he got was a small, “Thanks. I’d like to get to know you better too, for all I say about hating you.” Bucky finally looks at Sam, smiling lightly, eyes red, but all Sam saw was happiness._

_“Then don’t go into cryo,” Sam said softly, not seeing his mistake until it was too late._

_Bucky stiffened up, shrugging Sam’s hand off his shoulder, “You were just saying all that for Steve’s benefit, weren’t you?” He snaps, anger filling his voice._

_“What? No!” Sam feels like he’s been punched in the gut, and Bucky’s standing up now._

_“Admit it, you only want to please Steve. I see how you act with him -- you’re always trying to impress him, well how impressed and grateful would he be if you got his childhood friend to not go into cryo. He’d praise you, congratulate you -- that’s all you want isn’t it? To be accepted, to look like a hero,” Bucky’s spitting words out now, his voice getting louder and louder._

_“You don’t know a damn thing I want, Barnes. And it sure as hell isn’t to be accepted as a hero. And for your goddamn information, I’m not trying to “impress Steve.” I legitimately do not want you to go into cryo, but no apparently that’s just me trying to impress Steve, my feelings don’t mean a fucking thing.” Sam’s standing too, facing Bucky’s turned back. He’s angry. Not at Bucky, not at Steve, not at Tony. He’s angry at H.Y.D.R.A. for putting Bucky through all that shit for over 70 years, now resulting in this. He’s so angry, he wants to cry. He just wants Bucky to have a normal life…maybe, possibly, hopefully with Sam. Yes they’ve only known each other for maybe a week, and yes Sam’s life is really becoming a Disney movie, but Sam really wants to be the one to help Bucky through the modern world, to be there for him when he has nightmares, hell, to settle down with him and maybe adopt kids. But that’s not what Bucky wants, Sam scolds himself._

_Bucky hasn’t said anything still, and Sam doesn’t want to -- he’s afraid he’ll fuck it up again._

_“See you later, Bucky,” Sam says quietly before leaving, tears burning his eyes._

_Sam spent that night pacing his room, thinking for hours about why he reacted the way he did. He mulled over the time they had spent together, how Sam always felt safe and happy in Bucky’s company. Bucky was actually a really funny, chill guy. The more time they spent together, the more Sam genuinely considered actually settling down with him, helping him with PTSD, nightmares. Sam actually wanted that, but then it hit him at exactly 3:09 AM. He remembered because he had been staring at the clock beside his bed thinking about it all._

_Bucky most likely didn’t want that with Sam. He probably wanted that with Steve, he had only been talking with Sam because he’s gonna need another friend besides Steve._

_When it hit Sam, he cried for the next hour, until he fell asleep. Why did it always happen to him?_

So now here he is the next day, with Steve, in Shuri’s watching Bucky being prepped for cryo. Sam can’t say anything, can’t grab Bucky’s arm to prevent him from doing this, or else everyone in the room would be suspicious of his feelings, Steve would most likely feel betrayed or something… 

Steve’s putting on a strong face, so is Bucky. Sam is usually the one who’s able to pull it off; he’d had years of practice with it, but for some reason he can barely muster the energy to try, so he avoids eye contact. Bucky gives Steve a tight smile, saying it’ll be ok (Sam almost wants to laugh), then looks at Sam, who looks down at the floor, for fear of breaking down.

“Sam,” Bucky says quietly, and the entire room stills for some goddamn reason. Sam glances up, feels the tears coming, and can’t take it anymore. Everything’s too overwhelming, and before he can even attempt to get out of the fucking room, Bucky asks everyone to leave, to give the two of them a moment. Steve hesitates, of course, but Bucky gently reassures him they’ll be fine. The door closes, and the silence is thick. Sam leans against the table closest to him, gripping it tightly, trying to control his emotions.

“I’m sorry for yelling at you, before,” Bucky finally says, breaking the silence. Sam looks up and meets Bucky’s eyes. He sees Bucky is also on the verge of tears, and sincere about his apology. 

Sam shakes his head, looking back down at the table, “It’s not your fault,” his voice comes out small and wavering, “you were most likely under a lot of stress, and then I pushed you, and…” He takes in a shaky breath and squeezes his eyes shut against tears. He hasn’t cried in front of anyone for years, and would like to keep it that way, but fucking James Buchanan Barnes is about to break that streak.

\- - - -

How the tables have turned, it’s now Bucky’s turn to comfort Sam. He gets off the table he was situated on right before cryo, and slowly walks towards Sam. Who’s leaning against another table, very obviously trying to hold back tears. 

Sam doesn’t react when Bucky reaches him, and gently places a hand on Sam’s shoulder.

“I’m sorry about this, I really am, I just don’t trust--”

“Yourself? Bucky, goddamnit, I can help you with the trauma you went through, I’ve helped other veterans through their nightmares and PTSD,” Sam’s looking at him again, eyes rimmed red, eyelashes wet, “James, please, don’t do this,” his voice breaks and he looks away.

Bucky hesitates. He had a lot of time to think about what the hell was going on between him and Sam. He didn’t think it was possible in such a short time but he now couldn’t deny the fact he had feelings for the other man. When Sam left yesterday, after Bucky yelled at him, Bucky realized he had spoken out of jealousy. This whole time, he kept thinking Sam was after Steve, trying to be noticed. Which, looking back on it, was the stupidest thing to ever believe. And the feelings must have been returned, based on how Sam was acting about this whole thing. That night, Bucky had sat on his bed and stared at the wall until he was sure it would break in half, thinking about what the hell happened. Bucky had spoken out of jealousy, Sam was hurt but didn’t explicitly say by what. That was what happened. Bucky pondered over it all, then thought over how they had been acting with each other recently, after that god-awful car ride. 

They became more comfortable with each other, joked with each other more often. Bucky delighted in making jokes that would make Sam laugh so hard he would double over, it was a beautiful sound, and sometimes he would stare at Sam while he laughed, and if Steve asked what was up, Bucky would shake his head, smiling, then change the topic. Sam would tell him stories about the good part of his childhood -- Bucky knows bad shit happened in Harlem, he was always told to never go there, and Bucky knows Sam was sugarcoating some stories. Bucky once asked about Sam’s parents. Sam said they were both killed, his Dad when he was 9, his Mom when he was a teenager, and never talked about it again. Still, Bucky couldn’t help but think of what it would be like, Sam telling their kids stories about where he was raised, somewhere in a safe neighbourhood in Brooklyn -- maybe close to where Bucky was raised. Sam making jokes that Bucky was an old man, Bucky making jokes that Sam was a youngster, he didn’t know shit. But Bucky would always shut the thoughts down. He already made up his mind to go into cryo. 

But, thinking about it after their fight yesterday, Bucky was torn between doing what he wanted with Sam, put his potential family at risk, or go into cryo, then deal with it later. 

Of course, there was also Steve. God, Steve would feel…Bucky doesn’t actually know how Steve would feel about it all. Back in the day, they were kind of a thing -- always behind closed doors, moans muffled, feelings hidden from the public, for fear of discrmination, kicked out, or beaten up, or all of the above. Bucky was pretty sure Steve wasn’t entirely over him, but then again he saw how Steve was with Stark. Maybe he did move on. Then again, there was the whole civil war thing going on, so maybe it was over. Probably not -- knowing Steve, he would most likely try and mend it. 

Plus, his and Sam’s history was…rocky. Weird. Maybe they could try when Bucky got out of cryo. There was also the general public. Bucky may have spent two years trying to live a normal life, but hadn’t really paid attention to that part of society, there was other shit going on. It did seem like, where Bucky lived, it was a thing ignored, so Bucky ignored it too. 

“Sam…” Bucky starts, then sighs. Sam looks at him, waiting for something, but Bucky doesn’t know _what_ to say.

“Say I weren’t to go into cryo freeze. What would we do?” Bucky says instead.

Sam straightens up, wiping his eyes, looking a little confused, “I would take you to my place in Washington-- or Brooklyn, if that’s what you want-- or wait, I mean not back to _my_ place, you can have your own of course, I just…” Sam groans, obviously pissed at himself for stumbling over words. He tries again, “I would start showing you what you missed. Maybe a tour of the city, we’d listen to music through the years that you’ve missed -- like Marvin Gaye. I’d show you how to cook, take you to my favourite restaurants to give you a variety of foods, maybe we’d go through Central Park.” 

Sam pauses, “If you _were_ to stay at my place -- or wherever we would stay in Brooklyn, I don’t have anything there -- I’d help you through PTSD, nightmares, we’d practice things to get rid of all the shit H.Y.D.R.A. put in you, or you don’t have to do it with me, I can get someone else to do it…” Sam trails off, waiting for Bucky’s response.

“But what if I have a nightmare, the Winter Soldier comes back, and I hurt you?” Bucky asks quietly.

Sam shrugs, “I’ve dealt with men who have gone ballistic after waking up from a nightmare. Yes, I’ve acquired scars over the years trying to restrain them, get them to calm down, but I always do it. We talk about it after, and every time it’s not as bad as the one before.”

Bucky frowns, “Scars?”

Sam nods slowly, then very softly says, “I’ve never shown them to anyone, and they’re never that bad. But that’s not the point -- the point is, I have experience in this.”

“But Sam, if you haven’t noticed, I’m just a bit stronger than those men. I could…kill you, if the Winter Soldier got a hold of me.” 

“Fucking hell, Bucky,” Sam turns around, facing away from Bucky, then turns around again, rubbing his face with his hands, “what else do I have to say for you to get it?”

“What?” 

Sam moves forward, places his hands on either side of Bucky’s face, and then kisses him. Bucky is so shocked, he doesn’t do anything for a second, only registers how goddamn soft Sam’s lips are, and then melts into the kiss. They pull away after a minute, breathless, staring at each other.

“I like you, dipshit, and I _want_ to help you with all this,” Sam says.

Bucky’s brain isn’t working, so all he does is nod.

“I want to help you through the modern world, I want to help you with nightmares you may have, PTSD…” Sam trails off, resting his forehead against Bucky’s, fingers now tangled in Bucky’s long hair, “I want to be there for you, I want to be _that person_ for you.”

“Do it again,” Bucky whispers, his vocal chords not allowing him to go louder.

Sam frowns, “Do what--”

Bucky presses his lips to Sam’s again, pushing him against the table Sam had used before to control his emotions. Sam lets out a soft, “Oh,” when Bucky pulls away for a microsecond, before kissing Sam again, his tongue darting out to Sam’s lips. Sam softly groans into the kiss, and Sam’s hands go back to Bucky’s hair, pulling a little bit, re-tangling his fingers in Bucky’s already knotted hair. 

Bucky’s mind is set.

“I’m not gonna go into cryo, then. For you,” Bucky whispers, closing his eyes. 

Sam smiles wide, tears glistening in his eyes, “Actually?”

“Yes, dipshit. _I_ like _you_ too.”

“Do we tell anyone about…” Sam gestures between them, obviously indicating to their now relationship.

Bucky bites his lip, then shakes his head, “It would be too much for Steve, I think.”

Sam nods, “We should probably let the others back in now, it’s been…” Sam checks his watch, “20 minutes. Damn. A lot can happen in 20 minutes, it seems.” Sam grins at Bucky, who returns it.

They let everyone back in, not before fixing their appearances, and Bucky announces that he won’t go into cryo for now.

“What made you change your mind?” Steve asks, frowning.

“Just a friend,” Bucky says, a smile playing on his lips, while glancing at Sam.

“This is great, Buck,” Steve rushes forward, and hugs Bucky, a little too tightly. Bucky returns the bone-crushing hug, because he also did this for Steve. 

Shuri gives Bucky a knowing smile, glancing at Sam and then making direct eye contact with Bucky. Bucky in turn glares at her. Sometimes she was a little too smart for her age. 

\- - - -

That night, when they’re all saying good night to each other, Bucky just tells Steve he’ll be there later. His and Steve’s rooms are beside each other, while Sam’s is a little farther down the hallway.

Sam is a little confused by Bucky’s sudden change in attitude, but the minute Steve disappears around the corner, Bucky’s kissing him, pushing him into the room and closing the door with his foot. 

Oh, so he likes being dominant. Sam likes being dominant too so he shoves Bucky against the door, lifting him up. It’s a struggle, Sam will admit, since the metal arm makes Bucky a bit heavier, but he gets him up there. Bucky wraps his legs around Sam’s waist, and they’re still having the battle of tongues.

Sam carries Bucky to his bed, which is also a struggle, but he doesn’t let it show. Bucky crawls to the center of the bed, ripping his shirt off. Sam copies him, throwing his shirt to the side, while simultaneously making his way towards Bucky. The beds are bigger here than what he’s used to, and Bucky raises an eyebrow.

“We don’t have all night, Wilson,” except they do, “and this is my first time in years, I’m a little touch-starved.”

Sam reaches the man, and straddles his waist, shutting him up by capturing his lips with his own.

“Who’s complaining now?” Sam asks. 

“I wasn’t _complaining_ \--ah,” Bucky groans as Sam starts kissing Bucky’s neck, hands exploring everywhere.

“Sounded like it to me,” Sam says, working on a hickey.

Bucky stills, and Sam’s worried he’s done something wrong, except he’s suddenly flipped onto his back, and Bucky’s now straddling _his_ lap.

“Hey, this is my room--” Sam’s cut off with a kiss on the lips.

“Doesn’t matter, Wilson. I always top, that’s a little thing you should know about me,” Bucky’s hands start roaming lower than Sam’s had gone, and Sam’s stomach clenches when he reaches a particularly sensitive spot. Bucky takes note of this, smirking.

“Pants, off,” Bucky commands, and Sam has them off in record time, flinging them off the bed, waiting for Bucky to do the same.

“You gonna…” Sam gestures awkwardly to Bucky’s pants, which are still on for some illegal reason. 

“Hm. Maybe later,” Bucky hums.

“That’s not,” Sam gasps as Bucky kisses down his neck, knowing exactly what he was doing, “fair.”

“Oh, honey, we’re just getting started,” Bucky says sweetly.

That night, Sam got to know Bucky better in ways he couldn’t have fathomed. He knew exactly where to kiss that would make Bucky’s brain just stop entirely, he knew exactly where and how to touch to make Bucky submit to him, he never imagined this would actually happen. They had worn themselves out after he didn’t know how many hours, and hadn’t even bothered to clean up. Sam found himself being the little spoon, _that bastard_ , but was much too tired to do anything about it.

A shout wakes Sam up a couple hours later, sending him flying off the bed and into a defensive position. He realizes it’s just Bucky, then realizes he’s having a nightmare.   
Sam stills his shaking hands, and approaches the bed cautiously, almost tripping over his shirt in the process, where Bucky is thrashing around, occasionally saying something desperately in Russian. 

“Bucky?” Sam says softly, trying to wake him up, “Bucky, wake up.”

Bucky doesn’t wake up, so Sam puts a tender hand to Bucky’s shoulder, trying to maybe ground him, and he raises his voice a little louder, “Bucky, wake up. You’re having a nightmare.”

Bucky’s voice grows angry, and Sam tries again, “Bucky, babe, wake up please.”

Bucky sits straight up, glances at the hand on his shoulder, and has Sam pinned in two seconds. His right arm choking Sam, his metal one poised, ready to punch.

“James,” comes Sam’s small voice, working its way through his crushed esophagus, “it’s me, Sam.” 

For a second, Sam thinks Bucky won’t come back, and his heart is pounding, so all he can do is pray. 

Confusion melts into realization, and Bucky immediately lets go of Sam, getting back as far away as possible. Sam coughed, trying to clear his throat, and massages the bruises now forming on his neck. 

“Oh, God, it happened,” Bucky whispers in horror. Sam looks up, and sees Bucky at the edge of his bed, staring at his hands terror. 

“Bucky, it’s ok,” Sam says softly, “this is exactly what I was talking about before -- I can deal with this.”

“Have you ever dealt with someone about to punch you to death?” Bucky asks sullenly.

“And about to stab me, shoot me, strangle me. The list goes on, but I can handle it.”

“No, no, no, no, this wasn’t supposed to happen,” Bucky’s voice breaks, and he looks up, his beautiful blue eyes filling with tears. Sam crawls back towards Bucky, who jumps away. Sam feels hurt, but knows Bucky only thinks he’s going to assault Sam again. 

“Bucky, it’s fine -- come here,” Sam gestures him over, but Bucky isn’t moving.

“I knew this was gonna happen,” Bucky’s voice is hoarse, his eyes moving frantically like he’s planning something, “I fucking knew this was going to happen. I can’t control it, _him_ , this is too dangerous for anyone.”

“James, let’s talk about this,” Sam says, worried Bucky’s going to do exactly what Sam’s afraid of.

“Sam, we can’t just _talk_ about this, and all of a sudden it’s gone, it doesn’t work like that,” Bucky hisses.

“Of course it doesn’t work like that, it takes a while depending on the situation,” Sam says calmly, trying not to aggravate the other man more, “Bucky, what--”

“I’m going into cryo. Right now,” Bucky says, putting his clothes back on. Panic tears through Sam’s chest, and he starts stumbling over his words.

“Wait, Bucky, please, you can’t, you already decided this was a thing you weren’t going to do, Buck, please don’t do this, don’t leave me,” Sam whispers that last part, and Bucky pauses, hand on the door. Sam feels tears slipping down his cheeks, doesn’t even remember when he felt the wave of tears coming.

“You’re better off, safer even, without me,” Bucky says quietly, slamming the door behind him. Sam hears Bucky’s feet pounding down the hallway. He looks at the time, it reads 7:09 AM. Shuri would most likely be awake by now. 

By the time Sam reaches the lab, Shuri’s leaning against her bench, staring at the floor in shock, shaking and tears in her eyes. 

“Shuri, what”-- Then Sam sees it. 

Bucky’s already in.

Shuri’s in front of the container, tears running down her cheeks. 

“I’m sorry, he kept insisting on it, I was scared he would hit me, so I did it, and--” she presses a fist to her mouth to muffle her sobs.

“It’s ok, no need to apologize,” Sam says softly, putting a hand on her shoulder. 

“But it’s _not_ , you two were finally together, and I let this happen…God, you must hate me right now,” Shuri buries her face in her hands.

“It was his decision, you were just a victim roped in, don’t blame yourself for this. Please,” Sam grips her shoulder a bit tighter to get his point across. He’s holding back his own tears, which he knows will make an appearance the second he’s out of anyone’s sight. 

And, oh, how this hurt. Sam thought Bucky wasn’t ever going to go into cryo again, he thought it was a thing of the past, but no. One bad nightmare, and Bucky’s running as far as possible to keep Sam safe. Sam was also mad. Bucky promised he wouldn’t go into cryo freeze, because he had a reason to stay. 

_Bucky pressed a warm kiss to Sam’s shoulder, “I’m never going into cryo freeze after today. I have a reason to stay now.”_

_Sam smiled drunkenly, “Since when did you become such a romantic sap, Barnes?”_

_“Shut up, Wilson,” Bucky grumbled, pressing his face into Sam’s neck and pulling him closer._

_Sam could get used to this._

But, as Sam promised a couple days ago before they admitted their feelings to each other, he was going to wait for Bucky. No matter how long it would be. 

It reminded Sam of a loved one waiting for the love of their life returning from war. 

So wait for his loved one to return from war he would.


	4. Maybe Lovers for Real this Time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> once again!! i don't know how relationships work :) anyways this is the last chapter

There’s an awkward silence in the air as Bucky and Sam wait for Steve to return the stones. They never got a chance to talk about what happened before, as Thanos was a major priority. 

But now they can talk.

But they don’t.

Bucky watches Sam receive the mantle of Captain America from a distance. Sam deserves it, and anybody who thinks otherwise would have a little talk with Bucky’s fist.

They’re caught alone when Bruce leaves with Steve to get…something, Bucky didn’t hear what he said. 

Sam keeps staring at the shield, and Bucky almost reprimands him for doing so, but then Sam starts talking.

“Why didn’t you go with Steve? You knew what he did, you could’ve done the same,” Sam doesn’t meet Bucky’s eyes, voice quiet.

“He went back to live his life with Tony, he went back to the love of his life. Mine’s right here in front of me,” Bucky says, and lets out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding as he waits for Sam’s response. 

Sam looks up, and Bucky gets a beautiful view of Sam’s dark brown eyes for the first time in years. 

“What?” Sam asks, voice not even above a whisper.

Bucky smirks, “I thought it was obvious, Wilson.”

Sam shakes his head, “But…in Wakanda, I thought--”

“It was a rash decision on my part. I acted without thinking. It won’t happen again. I promise,” Bucky hesitates, then takes Sam’s free hand, “I want to work through whatever shit is still in my head from my past. I…I want to live in Brooklyn with you, see what I’ve missed, I want to do it all with you.”

Sam’s been quiet during Bucky’s second proclamation of love to him, and Bucky’s worried he’s fucked up ( _again_ ) but then Sam surges forward, pressing his lips to Bucky’s, and oh God he had forgotten how soft Sam’s lips were.

They’re like that for a while, just kissing and holding each other.

They have all the time in the world, anyways.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> steve went back for tony not peggy i said what i said. also idk if you noticed but the drive from romania to germany was 17 hours long. that is because i saw a post on instagram about how long it would actually take and thought 'hey, what better way to get these two idiots to hate each other' and now here we are.  
> i hope you enjoyed even tho this is not my best work <3


End file.
